-
their
last name stays the same
-
the garage is all theirs
-
wedding
plans take care of themselves
-
chocolate
is just another snack
-
they
can never be pregnant
-
car
mechanics tell them the truth
-
the
world is their urinal
-
they
never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one
is too icky
-
they
don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt
-
same
work, more pay
-
wrinkles
add character
-
people
never stare at their chest when they're talking to them
-
new
shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle their feet
-
one
mood all the time
-
phone
conversations are over in 30 seconds flat
-
they
know stuff about tanks and engines
-
a
five-day vacation requires only one suitcase
-
they
can open their own jars
-
they
get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness
-
their
underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack
-
two
pairs of shoes are more than enough
-
they
never have strap problems in public
-
they
are unable to see wrinkles in their clothes
-
everything
on their face stays its original color
-
the same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades
-
they only have to shave their face and neck
-
they
can play with toys all their life
-
one
wallet and one pair of shoes—one color for all seasons.
-
they
can wear shorts no matter how their legs look
-
they
can “do” their nails with a pocket knife
-
they have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache
-
they
can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes
